In order to forgive ourselves and others, we must truly heal and to do so we must know and feel the injury. Every pain is only considered a pain, when it is felt. Therefore your feelings have a major role to play in your spiritual development cycle. It’s not something to avoid or ignore. So many people face a lifetime of trauma that could be healed immediately, if they sit and grow through the pain but we live in a cowardly world where it seems unproductive to sit and do some self work.
We need to willingly and lovingly explore and heal the core of a trauma emotion – we must clean, purge and love it, from the inside out. Feeling in order to heal requires some degree of Self awareness and Self responsibility. It is important not to become polarized in or attached to anger and fear, etc. What is most needed is for us to visit, own, acknowledge and validate difficult emotions. Allowing ourselves to hear and see what is held in the body, organs, blood, bone, genetic blueprint and cellular memory is fundamental to our healing.
Life can be very unraveling when we begin to truly look at our emotions and experiences for what they are and not just what how they make us feel, sometimes it might take only a moment and for others it might take even longer. For example, if two people have same cut on their skin, the healing process might not be totally alike. One may take longer while the other heals faster and vice versa. But one thing is certain, they both feel pain. A couple of days ago, I was having a conversation with an old friend about how life and death are two sides to coin, likewise pain and pleasure. Every mother goes through pain during child birth, some feel more pain than others but one thing is for sure -“PAIN”. During the passage of death, some feel pain and others have it less painful. This shows that pain is in the natural cycle of life and we should accept it for what it is. A PROCESS. They all go hand in hand like an interwoven thread and until we accept them for what they are, we would never truly know what we are capable of.
Ultimately, difficult experiences and painful emotions arise to the surface of our healing radar in divine timing. What can emerge, often seemingly out of nowhere, are deeply stored emotions, repetitive patterns we may have thought we had cleared, as well as old ‘stories’ to conclude from lifetimes ago.
It is important not to go into too much detail when it comes to re-telling our story. If there is a powerful need to share over and over the story, then what can most serve the ultimate healing of it is to do so in no more than five words. However, to arrive at this point may require that we re-tell a story in greatest detail for as long needed, in order to help us to come to terms with what has happened. Yet, we find when closest to fully healing and letting go of a story, we have less to say in terms of detail and a deeper feeling impulse to feel the feeling we are left with so as to begin to dissipate it, slowly but surely, in the light of love and consciousness.
The emphasis must be on the feeling (felt-sense), not the story (mind). It is not the situation that causes our suffering, it is what the mind does with it. So, we literally need to get out of the mind, the who, when, what, where, why, breathe into the emotion and feel the feeling. In Psychosynthesis there is an effective practice that invites one to identify in order to dis-identify, to go inside, walk around, explore and examine an inner-wound.
Meditation and Visualization are great tools to get inside the ‘inside’. These are very potent methods to aid healing because we live in a world where perception becomes reality, visuals can become a powerful facilitator for Self healing. Just as yoga has its own magical healing abilities for the body and soul. ( See Yoga and it’s health benefits ). One thing I’m sure we all want, is to be entirely free from pain. Yet we avoid our feelings. But everyone wants to experience the ultimate bliss of pleasure. Like a popular African musician “Tuface Idibia” said, ” Nobody wan die, but them wan go heaven. Question is what are you willing to let go of to acquire what you desire? We live in a transactional world. One where you have to give to receive. Therefore, If you want to truly heal, you have to walk through the lonely and sometimes painful path of healing by FEELING.